 |
 |
 |
|
|
Here's some of the greatest stuff we've found for Brocket 99 fans. If you love Ernie Scar then sit back, relax, get pissed and have some fun with other cool CD's from Insane Shane McKane. Check out all of the Stop Bush gear at cafe press and don't forget to listen and vote for the MAACP show with Michael Anthony and Chris Paulus. - They're always playing Brocket 99 stuff and talk about the parody continuously. |
THE BROCKET 99 NEWS AND INFORMATION CENTER
February, 2007 Update
BROCKET 99: RACIAL STEREOTYPING IN THE GUISE OF A PARODY?, WHERE'S THE DVD, TV AND MORE
They all want in on the answers don't they? The CBC, The Toronto Sun, The Lethbridge Herold, and even the lil' Times Colonist. Everyone thinks they know what Brocket 99 is all about. "Journalist" Michael D. Reid of the Times says Brocket 99 is "racial stereotyping in the guise of a parody of a radio show hosted by aboriginals" While there is no doubt that Brocket 99 is racial stereotyping, I defy Mr. Reid to prove that it's in the "guise of a parody of a radio show". You weren't there Mr. Reid. You don't know for sure. Are you psychic? Maybe Brocket 99 is a parody of the radio industry itself. And maybe Natives were chosen to give the tape a comedic tone. Perhaps everyone who has any common sense knows that only some Aboriginals fit the stereotype of Brocket 99. And, perish the thought that many Native people themselves find Brocket 99 funny. What about them? What do you say of those folks Mr. Reid? Do you, as many of the elitist politically correct say "Those poor Indians. They don't understand. If they only knew how terrible this is." They know Monty. They get it. They just have a different way of looking at it. They take your "lemons" and make lemonade. Because to them Brocket 99 is harmless and it's funny.
Mr. Patel has said on several occasions that he has taken an unbiased view of Brocket 99 in his film. In the same breath he relates that someone must expose the injustice towards Natives. And that's what he's doing.
Cowboy Myth X - Lost in myth
You're as bad as Nilesh Patel who talks out of both sides of his mouth.
A COMEDIAN SAYS LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS "GOOD MEDICINE". WHY CAN'T WE LAUGH AT OURSELVES REGUARDLESS OF WHO IS POKING THE FUN? EVEN IF THE COLOR OF THEIR SKIN IS DIFFERENT, WE'RE ALL PART OF THE SAME HUMAN RACE.
December, 2006 Update
A YEAR END MESSAGE FROM ERNIE SCAR
20'th Anniversary a Banner Year for Brocket 99
Greetings friends and foes alike ... and even Government agents who monitor us for evidence that we're spreading "hate" hither and yon through cyberspace with the nasty activities of this website.
What a year its been for Brocket 99 fans! The big "20'th Anniversary" of everyone's favorite radio parody happened this fall, and I have to pass along my profoundest apologies that we weren't able to get the "20'th Anniversary Brocket 99 Box Set" together in time. Hell, Michael wasn't even able to get the Nightmare on Jerry Potts Blvd. T-shirt ready in time for Halloween this year either. But hey, what do you think we are here, made of money? Doesn't mean these items won't happen someday ... we just can't get it together here at the Big Tipi in time to meet big ticket calendar dates it seems; although if a whole new generation of Brocket 99 fans have been spawned by the efforts of some well-wishers in the indie film industry, news media and various other sundry branches of the arts this past year, a 50'th Anniversary Box Set (Gold Edition) may not be out of the realm of possibility.
The Summer Film Festival circuit was all abuzz (or so we're led to believe) with Brocket 99 this year. Director Nilesh Patel (so the legend goes) first came across the offending program in high school, where he thought it was a real gas. The years sped by, Nilesh began to re-think the whole matter, and after getting a sudden burst of Canadian Pride (at about the same time he began harboring designs on becoming a filmmaker of some importance) decided something had to be done. If you were near any showings of "Brocket 99: Rockin' The Country" this summer at numerous locations across Canada, you know the rest; Or at least, that's the official story in many articles and press releases about him and the film that all began to sound fairly similar after the first half-dozen or so.
Suddenly rating yourself a "Proud Canadian" after your Brocket 99 epiphany, and wanting to make the country safe for all citizens, regardless of race/color/creed (and maybe even buy them all a Coke, for that matter) is a noble aim, true. But wrapping yourself in the flag of peace, love, racial 'tolerance' and defense of the greatest multicultural success story the world has ever known ... the country of Canada ... seems pretty transparently self-serving when used to supposedly "fight" a small-time comedy tape from little 'ol Southern Alberta, circa 1986. Hopefully future reviewers will consider the more sub-surface intentions behind the philosophy of its being made (and the possible backfiring of its intent once it becomes more widely distributed) before adding to the Hosannas its already received in some quarters.
Then we've got this Cowboy Smith character, laboring under some illusion that he's made it his life's mission to obtain Justice For All Native People Everywhere over Brocket 99 sometime this coming century. A very humble fellow at heart, he's given himself a string of qualifications running the gamut from filmmaker, playwright, director, actor, radio host, producer, narrator, and probably Poet Laureate of the Blackfoot Nation for all I know ... and all once again (according to legend) originally inspired by early exposure to Brocket 99, before terms like "racist, misogynistic, fascist beast" had any meaning for him. Maybe the CBC could fire George Goofalopolous and hire Mr. Smith here instead, judging by all this truly properly-untapped talent, although he still can't seem to yet do an interview or write an op-ed piece without using the word insipid. Someone buy the man a thesaurus before it's too late.
I'm seriously doubting whether any of these people - and not only them, but other writers and commentators across the land who like to hold forth on this topic semi-annually - realize that their fake 'mission' only serves to perpetuate the hated Brocket 99 even further, and wider. If we'd all prefer that this program stopped spreading like some insidious cancer, maybe the thing to do instead of continually bringing it back to the attention of the entire world with every new impotent-rage cyberspace rant, is simply to shut the fuck up about it? But then, that might prevent some people with personal agendas that run beyond simply trying to stop an offensive underground radio show from a generation ago being heard ... from using that program to make individual names for themselves.
If Brocket 99 has helped a number of people (and let's not forget all the professional talent behind the camera too) pad their professional resumes, in addition to providing decades of laughs to those that also happened to get the joke, then I guess its been wildly successful on just more than one level.
Thanks to all those filmmakers (both present and future), newspaper editorialists, radio hosts, Internet bloggers and Social Activists nationwide for helping Brocket 99 to have a banner year in 2006: Here's to 20 more with your continued efforts and support. After all, there's no such thing as Bad Publicity.
With all my warmest wishes for the Holiday Season!
Your best love/hate relationship pal,
September, 2006 Update
BROCKET 99 TURNS 20 YEARS OLD ON SEPTEMBER 27TH, 2006 AND EVERYONE STILL GETS THE DATES WRONG! THE REAL ERNIE SCAR RESPONDS TO THE LETHBRIDGE HERALDS LATEST "BROCKET 99" ARTICLE...
So here we are on the official birthday of Brocket 99. Twenty years to the day that everyone's favourite radio parody was made and even the Lethbridge Herald still can't come up with the right year that our beloved comedy hit the streets. IT'S 1986 YOU MORONS! (why has the press never bothered to interview me? Fear truth and sanity do ye?) But I digress. Happy birthday to Brocket 99 and to those brave anonymous individuals (there's a contradiction in terms for ya) that made controversial history a generation ago. And of course a big SCREW YOU to the idiots that still don't understand Brocket 99. That's aimed at the politically correct Martin Whittles types and the imbecilic racists that think B99 is some kind of klan rallying cry. You're all wrong and incredibly ignorant!
But rather than I, Michael Anthony (current owner of Brocket 99 and host of MAACP Anti Radio) continuing to stick up for a cassette tape that hurts feelings and somehow makes society crumble, I turn the conversation over to the man who has been taking the fiery darts for oh these long years. He is of course, responsible for all of the hatred between the white man and First Nation tribes. He is the cause of the misunderstanding over Treaty 7. It is he alone that forces Aboriginals to drink Lysol and other sundry cleaning products. For without this man, Southern Alberta would be the ultimate paradise. The lion would lay down with the lamb. Or at the very least, white man and red could hunt the great white buffalo together and then go to the bingo hall for a spritzer, arm in arm. I give you the voice of Peter Yellowhorn. The man who was the brains of Brocket 99. His name...
Ernest K. Scar, Esq.
It never ceases to amaze me the length that the Lethbridge Herald will go to to keep the
legend of BROCKET 99 alive, even though everyone seemingly wishes it would go away.
Pretty soon I'm going to have to start a scrapbook to hold all the articles they
have printed on this subject over the years, regarding their city's biggest all-time news
story:
http://www.lethbridgeherald
BROCKET 99 started out originally as a send-up of 1980's Southern Alberta AM radio, and
particularly of the radio station in particular that all those involved worked at back in
those days. But two decades, and hundreds of copies of the program distributed
around the world later, everyone thinks it was some kind of maliciously planned attack on
the Native population. Well, what can you do? Even after the proclamation that
Mark Campbell had nothing to do with it, it seems that even decades after the fact, many
people aren't prepared to let the facts get in the way of a good Urban Legend.
Whatever.
We now have this film "BROCKET 99: Rockin' The Country" making the rounds; No
doubt intentionally at this point only in Alberta, where it seems BROCKET 99 has its
greatest impact.
The director Nilesh Patel is a young buck (pardon the pun) seeking to make a name for
himself as some sort of "filmmaker", and figures BROCKET 99 is a subject
divisive enough subject-wise to do the trick for him. Beyond that plan, I'm
reasonably sure that he actually cares very little for BROCKET 99 one way or the other.
Since - in his own words - his film is not a "whodunit", and which does not
actually point the finger or identify those responsible ... is not his film in the
end ultimately not ending up simply promoting BROCKET 99 even further, and is he therefore
not just as guilty as the GLOBE and MAIL, the LETHBRIDGE HERALD, DON AND MIKE, and even
this very website that sells the CD's, of promoting BROCKET 99?
No doubt this website will eventually wind up getting more orders for the CD of BROCKET 99
as a result.
So thank you Al Beeber, thank you Nilesh Patel. Let's all get pissed and listen to
BROCKET 99 one more time. Even though decades later, I still cannot explain what the
fascination is for this program. Now THAT would truly be a subject worthy of
someone's University thesis.
Ernest K. Scar, Esq. Producer.
MEET THE REAL ERNIE SCAR. CHARLES KANG DID
Charles Kang, longtime manager of Lenny Red-Nuts, has finally done the impossible. He has met face to face with the Creator, the Beginning, the Alpha, the one known as Ernie Scar. This was a paramount meeting of an industry standard of Radio Broadcasting and a Korean Promoter, Manager, and Brocketologist.
Many have tried to met the elusive and reclusive Ernie K. Scar. Cowboy Smithx has been on a ten year journey to meet, discover, critique, and possibly assassinate the Creator of Brocket 99. Cowboy Smithx has gone so far as to temporarily move to the city Ernie now resides in to come face to face with the man who motivated Cowboy on his career as an entertainer. Others such as famous aboriginal comedian Don Burnstick, who affirms that Brocket 99 was one of the catalysts that started him on his path as a comedian, has never met with Ernie Scar(not that he knows of). Film Producer/Director Nilesh Patel did met with Ernie Scar to discuss his documentary based on the Brocket 99 Broadcast, which has still not surfaced. There is no sense into delving deeper into the discontinuity of who Ernie has met and hasn't; what I will do is express my experience meeting with the iconic, the revered, the humble, the pissed, Ernie K. Scar.
Ernie and I have kept in phone contact since the release of Lenny Red-Nuts' "Tough Buck From Brocket" back in the summer of 2003. Ernie expressed his enjoyment of Lenny's album and claimed it to be a modern masterpiece. Big words for Ernie? Not so. Ernie is a lot smarter than what you think. I will attempt to debunk the myths and mythos of Ernie Scar and talk about Ernie Scar the man.
Ernie and I finally met. After a long trip from my home in South Korea and a short stopover in the Philippines to pick up my girlfriend(Brocket 99 Model), we stopped by Ernie's store to make plans for tomorrow evening. Ernie no longer works for the Brocket 99 Station in Brocket, Alberta. In truth, he is saddened by the monolithic path the broadcasting industry is currently taking, and thus he has become an Art Dealer of sorts. At first Ernie did not recognize me. Well how could he. At first, I wasn't even quite sure if that was him. His hair was slightly grayed with silver streaks reminiscent of the 25 cent coins squaws would put in the jukebox at the Lethbridge Hotel back in the day. I went up to the man and asked him if they had any aboriginal artwork from Brocket. Ernie smiled and shook my hand. He showed me his Brocket 99 cup featuring the Brocket Funeral Home. I introduced my girlfriend and Ernie mumbled something in Cree about wanting to make a papoose. Ernie showed he some aboriginal paintings he did carry at his store and commented on one painting called Lynol Lovers, "Now dis one is a good one. You can get a look at her brown tits."
I suppose Ernie was suprised that I am half-Korean and half-white. I myself was surprised by Ernie's eye color: the color of a northern icy-blue sea. Very unique for a Pikanii man from Brocket.
Ernie, my girlfriend, and myself, met the next day at Ernie's store. We picked up two 40ozers of beer(I think Old English)and proceeded to drive to Ernie's penthouse suite an an affluent part of town. As we were driving, Ernie expressed the multiculturalism of his neighbourhood and how colorful the language and people are in his area. I smiled and old him about my upbringing in an American controlled neon wasteland.
We arrived at his penthouse suite. Ernie gave us the grand tour. We got to see his recording studio, his French kitchen, his entertainment room(that would make Rick James blush) featuring eastern artwork of blue skinned gods, and his vast Italian balcony overlooking the sea. Us three sat, looked, and drank and discussed the everlasting, evergrowing, and everintoxicating question," What is Brocket 99?"
Ernie took another drink of his beer, and spoke,
"What is Brocket 99? Well, I can tell you what it isn't. It isn't what Martin
Whittles spray paints it on an old trailer in PC lingo. It isn't something that can
be easily defined. It isn't slanderous or racist or elitist. It isn't mine anymore. Brocket
99 has a live of it's own now."
I was shocked by what Ernie was saying. I asked him, "Then what is Brocket 99?"
Ernie chuckled. I cold see a big smile forming on his lips. His yellow teeth shone like jackolaterns on a Halloween night in the Java Shop. Ernie spoke and all went silent except the sound of his voice,
Brocket 99 started as a joke amongst friends. It was never meant to go any further
than a few friends and some musicians(some now famous) that would travel through
Lethbridge in the 80's. Brocket 99 is a snapshot. A single picture which looks hardly,
straightly, accurately to a lesser extent, and the situation of the people of Brocket as
well as other reserves in Alberta and possibly in Canada. I left Brocket 99 behind years
ago, but most people haven't. Martin Whittles says that there is a sub-culture of racism
and Brocket 99 is the heart of it. He is wrong. Don Burnstick and Cowboy Smithx have
a love/hate relationship with Brocket 99, and still they don't get it. I've meet two people
that actually got what Brocket 99 is: You and Laurie[She had a simple site with pictures
and some commentary on Brocket 99 and the Peigan Nation.]
Brocket 99 is relevant back then as it is now. It deconstructs the unobtainable American
Dream; it deconstructs the rat race most of us live in; it breaks down the barriers
of what is fact and what is fiction and gives us a greater truth, a greater commentary
on things if you are prepared is discard all preconceived notions and actually read
in between the lines. In the year 2020, Brocket 99 will still have relevance, will still
be funny, and will still have something to say. For myself and the other people
involved with this Brocket 99 Broadcast, it will remain a private joke amongst
us, but to the listener, it can be much more. You just need to look at what is
happening on the reserves in Canada and the US. to get what I mean. And if you
think the projects in the States aren't a reserve, then you are sadly mistaken. But on
the lighter side of things, Brocket 99 shows that we can laugh at ourselves and each
other without being offended.
Who says comedy can't teach?
We left Ernie Scar's suite enlightened and entertained. And that's what Brocket 99 is all about.
GOOD NEWS CONCERNING BROCKET RESIDENTS, BAD NEWS FOR A NATIVE SONG PARODY PASSED AROUND THE RCMP, CHRISTMAS IS CANCELLED, TOURIST INFORMATION AND MORE...
As most of you know this will be the last month for continuous news coverage here @ Brocket99.net HOWEVER, we will continue to scan the news and your letters and when a big story breaks that we feel needs to be here, you'll find it. We depend on our Brocketologists to help us with the Brocket 99 and related dirt.
We weren't able to put together the Christmas CD in time for the Holidaze but we're still working hard on it and will have the CD available in 2006 for the 20th Anniversary celebration of the world's favourite radio parody. We do have a few songs completed in the Brocket 99 tradition and know you'll be pleased!
NATIVE SONG PARODY PASSED AROUND THE RCMP
If you've been following the news on CBC or Canada in general you'll know that a big stink was made about a Native parody that made it's way around RCMP email and even Ontario Government email. The controversial song wound up in the hands of First nations RCMP officers and one of them lodged a complaint.
The RCMP stated that an investigation is taking place and that should the song have come from inside the RCMP, proper disciplinary action will be taken. The RCMP states that it encourages its employees to come forward with any complaints of harassment. However, according to CBC News, many officers told them that "such complaints often lead to being ostracized by co-workers and can ruin any chance of promotion within the force."
Brocket99.net obtained a full copy of the "Native Rap" also called "the RCMP's always chasin' me" The song was probably created by someone who's done other parodies like this in the past. Brocket99.net has does not endorse this song but does believe it has the right to exist. At the same time we believe that it should not be passed around to those who do not wish to hear negative remarks concerning Native people. It certainly should not have ended up in Government or RCMP mail.
If you know who may have created this song parody, please contact us. Your name and any information we receive will remain confidential.
Here is a small, uncensored clip of the controversial Native Rap.
GOOD NEWS CONCERNING BROCKET RESIDENTS
I was very happy to receive this letter about some of Brocket's best!
Just wanted to let you know I met some exceptional guys from Brockett this last
month. They all came to SPRINGBROOK Alberta and finished the drilling school with
exceptional marks. Hello all the Brockett guys along with Wil, Leonard and Merlin.
CONGRATULATIONS AND GOOD LUCK.
Skye Wikjord
How far is it to Brockett from Calgary? I might visit next time I am in Calgary if
it isn't too far...
Anything you recommend seeing there?
Thanks,
If anyone has any information they can give about places to visit in Brocket, I will be glad to pass this on.
THAT'S ABOUT IT BUT...
Finally; In the 2 plus years I've had Brocket99.net on the web, I've learned a lot about tolerance and even more concerning intolerance. And I never knew that I'd wind up owning and holding the copyrights for this piece of genius. That's right I said it again just so the globe and mail would know that I take full credit for saying it.
I get tons of email like this:
Haha, you claim you're part Native. That's like some black guy with a page that thinks back fondly on old blackface movies and Klan pamphlets or what about some Jewish guy who runs a website that promotes old Nazi propaganda against Jews -- because hey, man, some of those things they say are true! Seriously, you're a moron. What if a bunch of Native guys made a CD using stereotypes of white child molestors? Hilarious, right? Yeah. It sucks for Native children when there's people like you and Dick Twain around to terrorize them. A lot of the things being said are against Canadian hate laws so hopefully justice will be served.
My advice to this guy is to find some medication quickly.
Then there are letters like this:
your ful of shit......... too much brokett 99, which i know who did the master copy
of the 1st brockett 99
your jokes are cheap..... Bloods have the best indain jokes......... Not brockett.....
Join the guy above in some therapy sessions.
I get these letters too.: Jerry Bouchard - U THINK THAT UR DA ONLY FELLOWS WHO WANT TO BE NATIVE U WANT TO BE LIKE US THAT IS WAY U CRITSIZ US UR DUMM AND I DONT LIK BROCKAT 99 U GUS NEED TO GET SCHOOL
See above and double up on the meds.
I get the most hateful, racist emails you can imagine and people still don't realize (probably because they don't read pages like this) that I just wanted to promote the greatest "radio" parody of all time. I was never interested in making a statement about Native people. If there is a statement to be made concerning the condition of some Aboriginal's, it's that they were totally fucked over by white men. Don't ever forget; This is their land. You can plant your flags on it and kill whomever you choose but that doesn't change the facts.
Does this negate the Natives who do fall down drunk in the streets? No. But it all depends on where you live as to who's falling down in from of you. In Baltimore, MD., it's black people for the most part. In BC, it could be Asians. In the hills of West Virginia, there's a good chance that your "drunkards and bums" are white. So what? This problem is multi fold and you're not going to solve it by getting rid of comedy or racists, anymore than you'll eliminate racism by killing off the KKK. Even though we may want to.
You do not eliminate this problem. You realize that people, all people, are individuals. We become who we are by picking and choosing the beliefs that create our mindset. Sometimes that mindset changes with growth and sometimes it does not.
So what should we do? We should educate. We should open a dialogue between people. And we should further educate.But in the end it doesn't matter what any of us does. You can throw someone in jail, or fine them heavily, or beat the shit out of them. It doesn't matter. They will not change... unless they want to.
I highly respect an American by the name of Peter McWilliams. He wrote a book called
"Ain't Nobody's Business If You Do" (The Absurdity of Consensual Crimes in
Our Free Country) You can read the book for free online at: http://www.mcwilliams.com/books/books/aint/
or buy it here
Making a parody about Native people doesn't make you a racist. Listening to it and laughing doesn't. You can't make me into a racist for loving Brocket 99 except in your mind. My heart knows the truth. I will always judge the individual when I meet them. I'll never say I don't like this person because they are Cree or Pegian or African or Middle Eastern. I have my stereotypes. I make fun. I criticize. We all do. Come closer and I'll tell you a secret. Natives tell whitey jokes. Are you shocked? Appalled? Didn't think so. So don't you dare hold others to your double standard. You'd become like the Canadian Government if you did that. You'd be like the heartless media or politically correct who stand in judgement of right and wrong. They reporter, so pompous will say; What if you found this hateful song in your email. They look sickened and sound horrified. But they are the first one's to slap it up on the news for everyone to see. Why? Because it grabs you. It makes them money and they damn well know it!
If you don't like something, don't involve yourself in it. Disagree, make your views known and move on. You'll be better off. If it's a huge thing to you and you must get involved, do it. Make your point. Protest it peacefully. People spend too much time getting all worked up over things that don't mean that much in the overall scheme of things and too little time getting involved in what really matters. Your neighbor hates you because of the colour of your skin? Fine. Ignore it. Move away. Turn the other cheek or bake them some cookies and show them that your skin has nothing to do with your humanity!
Found guilty on several charges,
Michael Anthony
November, 2005 Update
ERIE SCAR CALLS IT QUITS, COWBOY SMITH UPDATE, A VIRTUAL TOUR OF THE REAL BROCKET, A BROCKET 99 CHRISTMAS CD, BROCKET CHRISTMAS STORE IS BACK... IN BLACK, HELP BROCKET 99 GET A WORLDWIDE AUDIENCE AND MORE
HOLIDAZE, STORES, CD'S...
Well, it's that time again. All the little squaws and bucks are gearing up for the holiday season! With that in mind check out the Brocket 99 gear store and get your loved one a new beer stein or shirt. And black tee shirts are back. Look for them in Harleys Christmas store and the Brocket99.Net gear station too.
And check out the CD page for a brand spankin new Brocket 99 Christmas CD too!!!
ERIE SCAR CALLS IT QUITS
Now on to the big story. Ernie Scar wrote to me recently about his life and moving forward. I thought I'd share some of his words with you;
For all intents and purposes, I'm taking myself out of the whole Brocket 99 picture. Did what I could, hope it helped you out, helped you to get a personal piece of the program you love so much. Was a gas doing it for you.
The door is always open for any comments Ernie. We will continue to support you and your work!!!
COWBOY SMITH UPDATE
We also heard from Cowboy Smith recently
Long time no speak! Just giving you an update. I've relocated to Vancouver, British
Columbia for academic pursuits. I am quite aware that Mr. Scar is somewhere within my new
proximity, so if you could please have touch base with me. Maybe we could finally meet. I
noticed someone sent you an email that stated this "Cowboy if your out their tell
them about our poor leadership!" I would love to know who sent this to you. I don't
know much about the precise goings-on in the Piikani Nation at this time. I wouldn't be
able to say much about the "poor leadership." I Just want to know who made the
statement.
Update on the Persey Klaw album; Owner of Snag Records, Tom Horvath, changed the
management of his studio in Calgary in early August, just when things were about to be
wrapped on the Klaw LP. Now that I have moved to Vancouver, things have really slowed
down, plus I still need two waivers from two interviewee's and your permission of course
to use Brocket 99 clips, so I expect things to conclude whenever the timing is right.
Sorry to keep you hanging, maybe, in the meantime, you could interview the man
himself...Persey Klaw.
VIRTUAL TOUR OF THE REAL BROCKET
A very good friend of this web site has sent us a ton of photos on his visit to Brocket, Alberta recently. This virtual Brocket tour is filled with realism and truth that should remind us that Brocket is a real place with real people. Click here to check them out.
I must also say that he has some of the stereotypical photos (and comments) that I'm not happy about in his photo album. It is my friends idea and the following pages are not associated with this Brocket 99 web site but I thought many of you would be happy to see the real travel log of Brocket.
My friend and I have talked about our differences concerning the portrayal of Natives. We see things differently. I don't like this view of Aboriginals. Then again, many people believe that this site presents a very negative view. It just proves that we all see things differently.
HELP BROCKET 99 GET A WORLDWIDE AUDIENCE
As the owner of this website it's been my mission to spread Brocket 99 to everyone. I stand behind my words that Brocket 99 is a piece of genius. There has never been a radio parody that has been this funny. And nothing's created this much controversy. But it's the humour that I love.
My radio show also has a worldwide audience. We reach Canada, the USA, Europe and even communist China with the MAACP show. Our show uses a ton of Brocket 99 content. We feature bits and use "Brocket talk" almost every day. For us, it's a matter of exposing comedy to everyone.
If you are a fan of Brocket 99 I ask that you vote for the MAACP show at podcast alley once per month and vital podcasts every few days.
LIFE GOES ON
Finally, I too am moving beyond this web site. It's been a blast but it's time to concentrate on other things. I'll be offering the CD set to everyone during the 20th anniversary celebration in 2006 but will cease sales at some point. I suggest you get them while you can. I won't be updating the site either unless something huge happens. One thing I've learned though is to never say never. Brocket 99 gear will continue to be available as far as I can see.
Thanks... thanks a lot!
September, 2005 Update
A REBUTTAL TO A FILM MAKER, A PIIKANII WOMAN ATTACKS TRIBAL LEADERSHIP IN BROCKET, A DAUGHTER OF A MAN WHO WAS SUPPOSEDLY MENTIONED ON BROCKET 99 STATES HER CASE, CANADIAN MILITARY DEMANDS PICS BE REMOVED FROM OUR SITE, AN UNFAIR ATTACK ON BROCKET99.CA AND BRYCE NICHOLSON?, WIKIPEDIA, THE END OF LENARD, AND MORE
Well, here we are exactly nineteen years after a few guys got together at a radio station in Southern Alberta and made a tape to share between themselves. It could have been a parody about gay people or Hutterites or something else. It turned out to be about Natives that were based on an Indian Reservation not far from Lethbridge. They called this 90 minute comedy "Brocket 99" and that was that. Or so they thought.
The tape started out like a slow leak in an old chevy. A few copies got made for some friends that heard it... probably after a Christmas party in 86. Those friends made copies for their friends. You know the story. Soon there were hundreds of copies. Later there were thousands. Today, with the internet, who knows how many copies exist and how many people know about this little 90 minute slice of history that might have just been put away and forgotten?
The fact is people are not forgetting about it. Everyone that knows about Brocket 99 has an opinion. Some people (including Natives) hate it and others love it. The ones who hate it say the ones who love it are racist. Unless of course a Native loves it. Then they say that they don't know any better. The high and mighty haters have decided that any Native that likes Brocket 99 is just a poor, ignorant person.Take a recent email from this genius. "i noticed all the people that thought this was funny claimed to be part native.they claimed to be part native.these are guys that have probably been drinking with non- natives their whole lives and get sucked into putting down natives to be part of the white crowd thay hang around with.there probably isn't anything native about them.to the way they think and feel and the people they've hung out with their whole lives"
In the world of the hater, there is no room for individual perspective. We must all be like one another. We are all a 'collective' hive. Thank God some of us realize that is a total lie. If we didn't, Natives might have given up on their own traditions and heritage. They might all be in suits and ties living like the hive. Well as long as I'm here, everyone will have a voice. Yes, even the haters.
So with that in mind; Happy nineteenth Birthday or Le Dix-neuvičme Anniversaire heureux Brocket 99!
A REBUTTAL TO A FILM MAKER
A PIIKANII WOMAN ATTACKS TRIBAL LEADERSHIP IN BROCKET
These emails were sent to me very recently.
As Of July 28,2005 our un-respected leaders have been outsted from there seats by petition of 1/3 of the memership, for mismangement of Piikanii Settlement Agreement of 64 Million Dollars. We have 14 days to come up with new election date. I will keep you informed. Piikanii needs advice if their be any Native Laywers out their to share the advise for our members on how we as a nation can keep this sort of scamming people out .
Email 2:
Cowboy if your out their tell them about our poor leadership!
A DAUGHTER OF A MAN WHO WAS SUPPOSEDLY MENTIONED ON BROCKET 99 STATES HER CASE
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN;
I HEARD ABOUT BROCKET 99 WHEN I WAS MUCH YOUNGER AND TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH I THOUGHT IT
WAS FUNNY TOO…AT FIRST. THAT WAS UNTIL I HEARD MY DAD’S NAME ON THE TAPE. IF
THIS WAS A PARODY YOU SHOULD NOT BE USING REAL IDENTITIES, I SUSPECT THE CONTENT OF THE
TAPE REFLECTS TRUE BELIEFS, ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU DID NOT MEAN FOR IT TO BE PUBLIC.
OTHERWISE I’M SURE YOU WOULD HAVE CHANGED THE CONTENT AND HID YOUR VIEWS. IT WOULD BE
DIFFERENT IF MY FATHER WAS A PUBLIC FIGURE MAYBE, BUT TO USE HIS NAME IS TOTAL DISRESPECT.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO MY FATHER IS. I FEEL YOU OWE HIM AND THE REST OF THE PEOPLE
WHO’S NAMES ARE MENTIONED IN YOUR TAPE A PUBLIC APOLOGY, INSTEAD OF EATING UP THE
ATTENTION. IF I WERE YOU I’D MAKE AMENDS AS THIS TYPE OF HUMOR IS NOTHING TO BE
BRAGGING ABOUT.
IT IS PROPAGANDA LIKE YOURS THAT FUELS RACIST VIEWS. DID YOU KNOW THAT IT WASN’T
UNTIL AFTER YOUR TAPE THAT WAS DESCRIBING HOW TO DRIVE INDIANS OUT OF TOWN AND LEAVE THEM
THERE (OR SOMETHING TO THAT EFFECT) A POLICE OFFICER IN WINNIPEG WAS CHARGED FOR THIS VERY
OFFENSE.
I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU AND I PRAY THAT MAYBE ONE DAY YOU WILL REALIZE WHAT YOU DID.
KIMBERLY ANN WEASELFAT
BLOOD NATION
Response:
Since those involved with the making of this tape never expected it to spread out, I can't see that they would feel the need for an apology. However, I do know the main character and believe that he did not mean for anyone to be hurt by the making of Brocket 99. He has in fact apologized to Chief peter Yellowhorn on this web site.
I am, at this point the person responsible for keeping the tape alive. I own the copyrights to it. However, as far as I know, the names mentioned on the tape were either made up or a matter of public record. The names of individuals cited for certain criminal activity are on file and were also mentioned in local media at the time this tape was made.
CANADIAN MILITARY DEMANDS PICS BE REMOVED FROM OUR SITE
You might remember some guys who were stationed in Kabul sent a letter and a few pics to us back in October of 2004. Well some asshole got their panties in a snit and went whining to the Canadian Military. The upper brass called our friend into the office and he got chewed out. So he wrote and asked that I remove the pics. I did.- 'That's right soldier. Die defending other people's freedom while we take away yours!'
AN UNFAIR ATTACK ON BROCKET99.CA AND BRYCE NICHOLSON?
Okay back to the Brocket 99 film that I never authorized. I was sent a 20 minute trailer of this documentary last winter. I'm sure it was full of just what they wanted me to see and nothing more. In the edit I saw, I was never mentioned and neither was the owner of Brocket99.ca. But apparently he is in this "new" unfinished version that is in limited release.
A recent article about Brocket 99 in the Globe and Mail states "There were a couple of fan sites. One is Canadian; it was recently shut down, but the founder appears, and not flatteringly, in the film." I don't know if this is true because I don't have the footage. I also don't have any proof that the site was shut down. As of today there is a message that says they are currently down but to check back soon.
People that regularly check out this site know that Bryce and I don't see eye to eye. In fact some people believe that we will one day take things too far and go at one another "Lethbridge style". Well the simple fact is that I don't like the way Bryce runs his web site. And I don't like that he used my parody without my permission. (something that many people have done and one by one are regretting) But it is his website and if he wants to show Natives in a negative light, he should have the right to do that. There is no copyright on taste. And the laws of Canada do not regulate his speech and expression. Brocket99.ca has a perfect, legitimate and lawful right to exist.
We will stand behind Bryce and his web site where it does not interefere with our copyrights. In fact, I am issuing an open invitation to Bryce, to express his views concerning the documentary and the state of his website here and on my radio show.
WIKIPEDIA
Believe it or not. Wikipedia, which claims itself to be "The biggest multilingual
open access encyclopedia on the internet" now has an entry for Brocket 99. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brocket_99
- " From Wikipedia.org -
"Brocket 99 is the name of a highly controversial underground comedy tape that
parodies Canadian aboriginals. The parody played on numerous aboriginal stereotypes and
has been characterized as racist. Nevertheless, the tape still maintains a cult-like
status across North America.
The tape was created in 1986 by radio DJs in Lethbridge, Alberta. The tape was never made
to be marketed and was only meant as a joke. However, since its creation it has been
distributed across the globe. Segments can be downloaded from the Internet.
The premise of the tape was a fictitious Native radio station broadcasting from Brocket,
Alberta on the Peigan Indian Reserve (a real reserve located south of Calgary), hosted by
a character named "Ernie Scar". It stereotypes natives as "drunken
bums" and drug addicts...
It may not be totally accurate. But it's close enough and does list us as the primary source for information on Brocket 99.
THE END OF LENARD
I've been thinking about this decision for over a year and I believe that it's time to put our Ask Lenard segment to rest. The site has grown beyond it and frankly Ask Lenard has become repetitive. We have wrapped it up for you with one last chapter which I think you'll enjoy. Thanks to the creator of Lenard for giving us some great moments and belly laughs! We will remove all contents from the Lenard section by years end.
NEW PRODUCTS
What could be better for your bedroom than a brand new Flick of the Switch Light Switch Cover? How bout new Fuckin' Whities gear. You get "Fighting Terrorism since 1492" on the front and a big FUCKIN' WHITIES message on the back. (not on every item) Not good enough? Well try looking at them again while you're making a beer run for a sixer of Cryinhead Lager. Check all of our new products out at the Brocket 99 store.
Fuckin' Whitey Car. Needs a spark plug,
August, 2005 Update
There is a huge update on the way. It's too big to enter here all at once. Right now I'm really busy with the radio show but rest assured I'm going to drop some huge bombs here so check back soon.
And that's on 23rd street south,
July, 2005 Update
CANADA DAY ALL MONTH LONG IN VIRTUAL BROCKET, YOU DON'T KNOW DICK AND MORE...
CANADA DAY ALL MONTH LONG IN VIRTUAL BROCKET
We're celebrating Canada day all month long with $6.00 off the Brocket 99 Party Pack. That's 8 CD's for $33.99 + s&h. Click here to start your party now! The party pack is only available at this special price on the link provided.
YOU DON'T KNOW DICK HITS SHELVES
The Dick Twang Band has released their first new CD in over 10 years. You don't know Dick is a continuation of the very controversial first CD 100% Dick Twang. With songs such as Alcohol Lake, featured on the MAACP Show, I own 1/264 of a casino, Trans Gender Indian, Trailer Trash Whore and others, I don't see the band being invited to any pow wows, unless it's for a good old scalping.
I interviewed Dick and get the impression that he's a very nice guy. He says that they get very positive reaction from Natives and request songs like Lysol Rap and Old Blue Car, (which were heard on 100% Dick Twang) quite often.
Keep in mind that parody hurts and uses real stereotypes to sell. You don't know Dick will probably be very offensive to those who are easily hurt and don't enjoy comedy in the Sam Kinison, Jim Norton vein. But if you can easily handle your dose of nasty stereotypical music, then this CD is a fantastic follow up to the debut. Check out Dick's official web site for more info and to order the CD.
BROCKET99.NET NEGOTIATES TO CARRY ANTI BROCKET 99 CD
Native Label Snag Records will be releasing the Persy Klaw CD in the next month or so. Klaw's CD is supposedly the first "real" rebuttal to Brocket 99 and Ernie Scar in particular.Klaw has already appeared on the Snag release Rhymes from the 49, featuring all Aboriginal Rap bands such as Blood Rez, Brothaz Grimm, E-Kru and others. We are hoping to carry the Percy Klaw CD right here on the B99 web site. Now how's that for an open forum?
AN ANGRY BUT THOUGHT PROVOKING LETTER TO THE EDITOR.
If you follow this web site you know I get negative letters often. At least this latest letter from Bryce made some valid points. I still don't believe that people like Bryce quite understand parody. To those of us who hadn't known about the racial controversy surrounding Brocket 99, it was a statement about radio and to this day still carries that distinction. I don't ask individuals to accept or even like Brocket 99. I simply want them to understand that there is certainly more than one point of view surrounding this piece of work. And when full blooded Natives from Brocket, such as Cowboy Smith can understand that, why can't folks like Bryce?
The letters
From Bryce L. Wren
You said "I, myself am part Native. I may be Cherokee or Chickacoan as far as
I'm able to gather. My family is not actually sure and my grandmother was made to feel
ashamed of her Native Blood."
My response: I am metis. My great grandmother was 100% Sioux. She too was made to feel
ashamed of her Native heritage, as was my mother and the rest of their family. They were
made to feel that way by the attitudes, and disrespect that people like you perpetuate
with crap like this. You think it's okay to trash on a people, simply because you may have
a little of their ancestory in your blood, but you don't have the right. You can make your
tapes (they are about the equvillant of the old "Stephin Fetchit" character
drawings of blacks from the early 1900's) all you like, but when the day ends, you are
simply a bad person. I don't give a fuck if you think it's okay, to provoke stereo types,
and to make a nation of people feel bad about themselves, is about as low as a human can
get.
You seriously should be ashamed, but truthfully, you lack the cognetive capabilities to
understand simple human feelings.
You may think it's funny that a lot of racist white people are now laughing at Native's
and making fun of them, and that by you claiming to be "part Native" you have
given them an "okay" to use the same language, but it's not funny. You clearly
have no idea that you should be embarassed for yourself, so I will be embarassed for you.
You are a disgrace to any race.
Sincerely,
A much better example of man
Bryce L. Wren
Bryce,
I appreciate your letter. I understand where you are coming from and respect your opinion. Brocket 99 does not represent, in any way an opinion of all Natives. It represents comedy and parody and a stereotype that is true of some in the Native community and in fact, some in every community.
The problem is that you believe that your opinion is the right one. Other full blooded Natives from the actual Brocket Alberta community love Brocket 99 and take it as comedy. Many people agree. Others do not. As long as we are individuals, we will always differ. That is the beauty of being different.
Perhaps you are a better example of man... but again I disagree.
Sincerely,
Michael Anthony
More from Bryce,
Thank you for your prompt response to my email,
I'd like to add this to my original comments:I first found out about "Brocket 99" from a friend of
mine from work. He's a white guy. I never thought of
him as being a racist. I knew he had some redneck type
friends that liked to make ethnic jokes, but I had
never seen him personally do it. He knew that I used
compupters a lot and he asked me if I could look up a
file called "Brocket 99" on the net. He said he had
listened to it when he was younger, that it was a
"hillarious comedy tape" that would make me laugh my
head off. He knows I'm part Native. He told me that it
was a "bunch of Natives that made a tape back in the
early 80's" and that they "played a bunch of good
heavy metal" on it and that they made some good "injun
jokes". I told him I'd look it up and see if it was
still around. I found several "boot leg" copies of
your "work" on Kazaa. I did not listen to the entire
recording. It came on two large files. I listened to a
few minutes of it, and I realized that it wasn't a
bunch of Natives naively mocking themselves, but a
bunch of racists making fun of anotehr ethnicity. I
don't consider some dude that got "nicked by an
arrow", that has no concept of what his heritage is,
as a real Native persons, and I think it's
intellectually dishonest to claim to be one when you
are not. So I decided to look up "Brocket 99" on the
internet. That's where I found your website. There
were many more websites devouted to your racist
recording, most of them were from white individuals
that think making fun of Natives is hillarious.
Apparently the majority of your "fans" that love your
work are not Native at all, but I'm sure you already
knew that. The couple of Natives that you did find
that said they thought it was hillarious, really does
not even things out. You could find Jews that
volunteered to throw carcasus of dead friends and
relatives to win favor with the Nazi's too, but I sure
wouldn't say they were speaking on behalf of Jewish
people, nor would I call them moral men. You could
find the odd black guy that will make "black jokes" in
front of his friends in order to find some acceptance.
So lets say you found 50 Indians that thought your
recording was funny, or "ok". Does that somehow
justify the way you have perpetuated stereotypes about
an entire race? Does that make it "fine" that you have
mocked an entire species of mankind and made them
sound like they are all a bunch of drunken solvent
sniffing losers? My mother was 1/4 Sioux, and she is
one of the smartest people I know. She's not an
alchohohlic, and she has used her photographic memory
to become one of the most succesful business people in
her trade across my entire country. She's the kind of
example that should be used to help Native's get out
of the rut they find themselves in, not by making fun
of the few that have it so bloody bad that they
actually would consider sniffing a solvent.
You don't know what it's like to be born to the
parents of solvent sniffers. To have no self esteem
because people look at you and see a stereotype, and
not a living, breathing person. My mother, who at the
height of her career made aprox. $450,000.00 annually,
yet when she travelled to Mexico one time, another
travellor saw her darker skin color and walked up to
her and shoved her bags at my mother and said "Here,
here's a dollar, carry my bags". All of this because
of her skin color.
I don't think you realize it, but by spreading this
kind of hurtful material, you are just as bad as the
KKK people that used to spread black explotation
cartoons. It's not right, because it's never right to
hurt thousands of people for the pleasure of a couple
of bigots.
Anyway, back to where I was with my "friend" from
work. I told him I downloaded the files for him, but I
also told him that I found the material quite
offensive. He apologized, and said he could barely
remember what was on it, but that he thought it was
funny when he was 12 years old. That I can understand,
because 12 year olds think that fart jokes are
hillarious. Grown-ups should know better.
I just feel that someone that has some comedic talent,
as some people seem to feel you have, could use it to
make people laugh without humiliating an entire race.
I'm not saying you should go get a head dress and
start doing rain dances. I'm just saying that there is
no need for you to continue to distribute something
that causes hurt.
When I drive downtown in my city, and I see the state
that some of the Natives live in, it makes me sad,
because I know the solvent users and the under age
prostitutes have no self esteem. When I hear some
white person look out the window and say "dirty
Indians" or something, it really upsets me, because
there was a time when Aboriginal people's were strong,
intelligent, fruitful people. It's hard to get out of
a rut so huge as the one they currently find
themselves in. You can't possibly have any idea what
it is like to live on a reserve. To live in a
community where self esteem is so low. To be a child
in a community filled with dependancy and addiction. I
know that I'm glad I wasn't raised on a reserve, but I
know enough to feel bad for the less fortunate
children than me. Not to mock them. I could have been
one of those kids, and so could you have. Maybe you'd
feel different if you were a little kid who had a
solvent abuser for a mother and a drunken gambler for
a father, neither caring what time you came home at or
if you came home at night. Well, those kids are the
ones that grow up so disfunctional that they have no
idea how to function productively. I know you didn't
cause the problem, but when you contribute to the
humiliation of those people, you are part of the
problem, not the solution. Nobody said you need to be
part of the solution, it's not your burden. It's
neither your right to be part of the problem.
You seem to think that we simply have a difference of
opinion, I see it as a complete difference of moral
integrity.
Yours truly,
Bryce L. Wren
Whew! Well, now I'm just too tired. Guess Bryce and I will have to continue to disagree. Are you amazed how so many human beings can see things differently? I am and by the looks of it, I will always continue to be. If you have a different view, make sure to write us anytime.
Fuckin' Whitey's
June, 2005 Update
GREAT WHITE BUFFALO, PART 2 OF THE COWBOY SMITHX INTERVIEW, MIKE DOWSE IS BACK AND MORE...
THE RETURN OF THE GREAT WHITE BUFFALO
A rare white buffalo was born at the Blatz bison ranch in north eastern British Columbia. The calfs name is Spirit of Peace. He was born in the North Peace country and the calf is a symbol of peace for First Nations. Certain native cultures consider a white buffalo a sacred symbol of hope, rebirth and unity. - Could this buffalo be a direct decendent of the great white buffalo that Wilton saw with his one good eye, all those years ago?
COWBOY SMITHX AUDIO INTERVIEW PART II
Originally from Brocket Alberta, this young DJ/Actor is on a qwest to bring Ernie Scar out into the public. There seems to be dual edged reasoning in his mind. Yes, Cowboy wants Ernie to answer the questions that the Native community has but also he wants to "help" Ernie and thank him. "I want to make it very clear that Brocket 99 was a very big influence in my young career... I wouldn't have gotten into radio if I hadn't heard the actual tape... If it were not for him (Ernie Scar) I'd probably be doing something that I'd be disgusted with for a career." Listen to the conclusion of our interview with Cowboy Smith.
MIKE DOWSE IS AGAIN FUBAR IN IT'S ALL GONE PETE TONG
The man who made FUBAR and spotlighted Brocket 99 with a small soundbyte at the beginning of that film is back. From michaeldowse.com IT'S ALL GONE PETE TONG is a biopic based on the tragic life of world famous DJ Frankie Wilde. The story follows Frankie’s life from the euphoric peak as one of the most sought after DJs alive, through his sudden deafness and subsequent depression, and culminates in his mysterious disappearance from the scene.
UPCOMING INTERVIEW WITH SAMMY EAGLE VOMIT
The man who played Sammy Eagle Vomit has agreed to be interviewed by Brocket 99 Entertainment. Mr. "Vomit" was also Barton Weasel Foreskin. We think he's also the tag guy for the Funeral announcements and the subliminal suggestions commercial. -One thing for sure. We'll find out alot more when we interview the man behind the puke! Coming up soon! - UPDATE: We hope to have Mr.Vomit giving us some lowdown in the month of June.
POSITIVE WORDS FROM NATIVE'S ABOUT BROCKET 99
I like the humour alot, I first heard it in the 80's I believe. My Mother is 70 years old and again she also loves the recordings, especially "BINGO" and "I'm Too Sexy". I am 3/4 Cree and my mother is a full blooded Cree Indian! If we can't laugh at ourselves, who can we laugh at! We as Indian people have always found humour in one another! Keep it coming! Lyndon Lerat Lyndon's Aboriginal Cuisine
Editors note: Thanks for the great compliments about our favorite parody. I just want to point out that songs like BINGO and I'm too sexy are not part of the original Brocket 99 show and were not created by the same people. We are on a qwest to find the creators of these paroies as well but have been unsuccessful to date. - If you have any info on the creation of these parody songs, please write us. - M
tansi! I am a 'full-blooded' cree from sask. I have heard your stuff and well, I think the majority of it is pretty funny. There was some shady content in some material, but, I thought maybe it was more degrading to women than anything else, and I am sure you got their feedback. But, hey, you got us talking eh? take care...
A PLEA FOR HELP
We received this letter last month; - I'm a young mother of two girls, and I'm trying to find my family tree. My father died when I was 14years old and lost touch with his side of the family. I know I have native in me and I want to learn more! people have suggested that their is help out their for me and my children if register for The Metis Nation of Ontario application, but don't have enough information to fill it out. I know that my father's father's father married a indian princess from her tribe and he was a french man. She left her tribe and shortly after she had an accident and died. I was told of the family ring that exsist but never saw it it's in the family among girls passed on through generations.I believe it was the tribe with the red feather. but I'm not completely sure. If anyone can help me or put me in the right direction I would be grateful. Sincerely Crystal Revette - Write us here at Brocket 99 and we'll post the info and email Crystal. Thanks much. - M
LIKE BROCKET 99 PARODY SONGS? WE THINK YOU'LL LOVE INSANE SHANE MCKANE
Insane Shane is sweeping the Hick Hop world with his blend of Rap and Country music. Shane's sarcastic comedy adds to the genre in a style that hasn'r been heard before. You'll get songs like I always stand up straight in my handcuffs and more. Buy Shane's new release, I put the ho in hoedown by clicking here for only $8.99 with Free shipping to the USA & Canada.
2005 LETTERS - HE'S BAAAACK!
Lenard has escaped from the clutches of Rosie and Stella. There's a lot of catching up to do. Check out Ask Lenard. WARNING: ASK LENARD IS A CONTINUING PARODY OF BROCKET 99 COMEDY. IT IS BASED ON NATIVE STEREOTYPES AND MISCONCEPTION & IS CONSIDERED VERY OFFENSIVE BY SOME.
The greatest of the Spunkupthebum's,
May, 2005 Update
THE COWBOY SMITH X FACTOR INTERVIEW, UTTER CRIME, BROCKET99 CHARACTER MEETS DON BURNSTICK, COLTON YELLOWHORN AND MORE
COWBOY SMITH AUDIO INTERVIEW
I am pleased to open up the Brocket 99 forum to anyone who wants to be a part of it. For months I've asked people to come forward and give their views about Brocket 99 and the current state of affairs with Natives.
Recently Cowboy Smithx (his real name) a full blooded Native originally from Brocket, Alberta was kind enough to share some of his time with me. We talked about the Native record label SNAG, a man by the name of Persey Klaw and Brocket 99 among other things. In the first part of our interview Cowboy and I spoke about his desire to bring Ernie Scar out into the open. Listen to the interview by clicking here. The full interview with Cowboy Smith will be available soon via the Michael Anthony Show web site. And you can catch up with Cowboy's quest for the answers to Brocket 99 on his site.
ERNIE'S NEW SCAR
A retort to Cowboy Smith's latest Brocket 99 web post.
"I think a common misconception for many people is still that Ernie Scar is still out in the workforce every day doing his thing ... Hence we get these demands from people like this cowboy for me to "come clean" and apologize so i can "save my neck". That's all I mean about living back in 1986. That's where this thing is for me ... a snapshot from a scrapbook of Alberta in 1986. Its like asking John Lennon to talk about the White Album. His experience is not the same as that of the rabid fans. Ernie Scar doesn't work here anymore. I just wish people could get that through their heads." Check out more of "Ernie's" thoughts.
UPCOMING INTERVIEW WITH SAMMY EAGLE VOMIT
The man who played Sammy Eagle Vomit has agreed to be interviewed by Brocket 99 Entertainment. Mr. "Vomit" was also Barton Weasel Foreskin. We think he's also the tag guy for the Funeral announcements and the subliminal suggestions commercial. -One thing for sure. We'll find out alot more when we interview the man behind the puke! Coming up soon!
THE UTTER CRIME IS A CLOSED MIND
I realize that I beat a dead horse in my defense of Brocket 99. But I believe that people deserve to express their opinions and therefore I allow myself a response to those that see Brocket 99 in a negative light. After all, I'm just trying to help the story along. Right Buzz?
Here's the latest letter from a woman from the Nishnawbe Aski Nation
Michael is it? (though I'm fighting every urge to call you something else less respectful! ...though lowering myself to the putrid depths you occupy would likely do me little good). I am compelled to write simply because I am so incredibly disgusted and angered by the so-called 'parody,' you offer on your website, products, cd's, radio, etc. You think claiming a minimal percentage of indigenous ancestry gives you the liberty to perpetuate stereotype and further demean indigenous people who have been battling such injustices for longer than you've been alive?! What a disrespect and utter crime!!! Making light of the various afflictions that affect our people is not providing tangible cure. You are enabling the most basic of racist diatribe. If you were even an iota of the 'native' man you claim to be, you would know better and cease to do ‘the man’s’ bidding. How many white guys are paying you to do this anyway?? I suspect that the amounts of angry emails you receive far ! outnumber the few praises you have posted on your website…yet you persist. Have you no shame, conscience or sense of obligation to your ancestry? (if that is in fact a truth…though I have my doubts there is any portion of our proud, strong ancestry running through your cowardly veins). I do have the sense of obligation I speak of, and it’s why I cannot adequately express in written word how much I dislike you and the type of ‘humour’ you advocate. Now please…can you cut and paste this on your website?!
In truth and convinction,
Deanna Marie Therriault, Nishnawbe Aski Nation
I'll take this point by point.
"You think claiming a minimal percentage of indigenous ancestry gives you the liberty to perpetuate stereotype and further demean indigenous people who have been battling such injustices for longer than you've been alive?! " - My Native blood has nothing to do with giving me the right to spread laughter. I do it on my own and not becasue I belong to a race of people. I'm part German too. If I find a parody about Hitler will that make me a bad example and shame the Germans into not loving me? I'd hate to be shunned by that kind skin head community too.
"You are enabling the most basic of racist diatribe." - Racism comes from deep within ones mind and heart. Actually my own opinion is that some people would be less likely to be prejudice towards Natives by listening to Brocket 99. I myself was lead to learn more about the real Brocket and the Pegian Nation becasue of it.
"I suspect that the amounts of angry emails you receive far ! outnumber the few praises you have posted on your website…yet you persist" - Never ass-u-me. Actually I do get more positive mail than negative. Although I welcome everyone's opinion no matter how scathing.
"I have my doubts there is any portion of our proud, strong ancestry running through your cowardly veins). I do have the sense of obligation I speak of, and it’s why I cannot adequately express in written word how much I dislike you and the type of ‘humour’ you advocate. (though I'm fighting every urge to call you something else less respectful! ...though lowering myself to the putrid depths you occupy would likely do me little good)" - Sounds to me that your "sense of obligation" was lost in the cracks. One difference between you an I is that I can tolerate and appreciate our differences of opinion. It seems like you don't have that same tolerance. Tolerance - The capacity for or the practice of recognizing and respecting the beliefs or practices of others.
COLTON YELLOWHORN OF BROCKET INJURED IN CZECH REPUBLIC
ColtonYellowhorn, an 18 year old from Brocket, Alberta Canada was injured on April
24th, in the U18 hockey championships when he was driven head first into the boards with
minutes to go in the third period by U.S. forward Justin Mercier.
Yellowhorn was about a metre out from the boards with his back to Mercier when Mercier hit
him from behind. Yellowhorn, who plays for the Lethbridge Hurricanes, raised his head and
tried to get up, but then lay on the ice while medical personnel brought a stretcher onto
the ice. He was able to move his hands while laying on the stretcher and he was applauded
by spectators in the arena as he was taken off the ice. He was said to be experiencing
neck pain, but was conscious and alert and able to move his arms and toes.
"The most important thing is his health right now," "That's our
biggest concern right now." Canadian head coach Shawn Camp told TSN after the game.
Mercier received a match penalty. The conclusion of the game was delayed by several
minutes and watching their teammate getting rolled off the ice on a stretcher seemed to
sap the Canadians.
Colton Yellowhorn is the one to watch as he rises in the National ranks. Many are
expecting Colton Yellowhorn to be one of the next NHL greats! Check out more on Left Wing
Colton Yellowhorn at the Lethbridge
Hurricanes official web site.
LENARD IS MISSING - LAST SEEN TALKING TO DON BURNSTICK AT A MOTLEY CRUE CONCERT
Brocket99.net advice columnist Lenard Moccasin is MIA. If you see him, follow the instructions on the Brocket 99 CD. Click here for your copy.
TWANGIN' UP FOR SUMMER
Finally, springtime brings a new CD. The long awaited follow up to 1993's 100% Dick
Twang is here. You don't know Dick should hit the streets on May
15th. That's according to the official Dick Twang Web Site. 
ANOTHER B 99 FAN SURFACES
Check out the fan page and send your pic in!
Fuck you. I'll look in the fuckin' paper,
April, 2005 Update
BROCKET99.NET 2ND ANNIVERSARY BRINGS BIG NEWS, SAMMY EAGLE VOMIT AGREES TO AN INTERVIEW, MORE ERNIE SCAR AUDIO AND A NEW STATEMENT, FORGIVENESS & DIALOGUE, SCAR CHALLENGE & DIRECT REBUT TO BROCKET 99, BRIDGES, LENNY REDNUTS AND MORE...
STILL KICKIN' AFTER TWO YEARS
Brocket99.net Celebrates its second birthday in April.There have been some changes to the site since the beginning and there will be more to come I'm sure. We are proud that we're able to give fans and foes a place to come and voice their opinion. We also pride ourselves in keeping things fresh and not allowing dust to form on our web site. And now for some huge news!
SAMMY EAGLE VOMIT AGREES TO AN INTERVIEW WITH BROCKET99.NET
We recently caught up with the man who played the character of Sammy Eagle Vomit and recorded some of the Brocket 99 tags for the original parody. Mr. Eagle Vomit has agreed to an interview as long as his "face is blocked out on the radio". We hope to talk with 'Sammy' in a few weeks. Stay tuned!
MORE ERNIE SCAR AUDIO AND A NEW STATEMENT
There is more audio from my interview with Ernie Scar available here. Learn the real story of Clayton Magnet. Find out what the real Perline Pricly Bush's father did when he heard Brocket 99. Will there ever be a Brocket 99 reunion? All of these questions are answered. Check it out!
Several months after the Ernie Scar interview was conducted I was listening to the rough cut and noticed that there was one question that I believe needed clarification. It's something that everyone seems to ask. So, I called 'Ernie' back and here's what happened...
Why you don't ever just come out and reveal yourself? Why not just walk into a tv station
or press room and say; "I'm Ernie Scar and here's the proof."?
'Ernie' "I don't want the hassle. I don't need it. If people want to continue to live in 1986, let them." Read more of his thoughts here
He told me more but his answer was perfectly summed up in those small sentences.
Keep in mind that 'Ernie' said that Brocket 99 was never intended for the masses. It was a private joke between a few friends. And those friends made copies for their friends and so on. After internet access and file sharing came onboard the parody spread like a virus. And seventeen years after the first tape was released, I (Michael Anthony) obtained the copyrights and helped to make the parody even bigger. In essence, I am much more responsible for keeping the parody alive than 'Ernie Scar' ever was. Ernie never wanted to spread the parody because it was not his intention. But even if I were to shut the site down and no longer offer Brocket 99, it will still go on without me. It is unstoppable. Because it's just that damn funny!
And if we look at comedy or art in general, note that almost everything has been judged. Monty Python's work has been called blasphemous and racist. Many religious Christians believe that the Wizard of Oz is evil. Plenty of groups call for banning the little rascals because of its supposed racist overtones. And there are so many other examples from recent history that have been attacked and misunderstood. Sam Kinison, Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock, NWA, Eminem, Public Enemy, Madonna, Southpark, The Simpsons, Trailer park Boys, Tom and Jerry, Bugs Bunny you name it. Even political systems, world leaders and religions are often misunderstood and misinterpreted.
SMITHX ISN'T SURE
So we've clarified that Cowboy Smithx is real. (see below) I've been following the man on a mission since then on his web site and really enjoy what he's doing. He is passionate and artistic. I believe there is some mutual respect between Smithx and I. But after my statement "Since we get email from a ton of crackpots, I figured that Cowboy and Percy were phonies.." the cowboy says he's not sure he forgives me for not believing him. I just write things the way I see them. Sometimes I'm right and sometimes I'm wrong.
Let's look at the facts. I receive about 50 Brocket related emails every month. Many of them claim to know who Ernie Scar is. It's the brother's uncle's cousin of a friend. Then there are the people that have extra Brocket 99 audio and documents. You know the story. So I write back and 99% of these people are full of hot air. There are billions of people on this planet. I've had over 1200 Brocket emails and maybe 10 of them had some substance. I should believe one email from a guy that rarely writes back and comes out of nowhere? I couldn't even find the name in a search engine until recently. It's a simple case. I don't understand why Cowboy takes this so personally. I didn't initially believe you. By the way, I didn't always believe "Ernie Scar" in the beginning either. Things change Cowboy. You should know that better than anyone. Your grandfather loves Brocket 99. You loved Brocket 99 in the beginning. It was only years later that you began to question it. - Source material taken from Cowboy Smithx web remarks concerning Brocket 99.
Cowboy you also said on that same page that you wanted to thank Ernie Scar for being an inspiration to you and then bitch slap him for hiding all these years. First of all you are looking for a ghost because Ernie Scar is a fictional character and Brocket 99 is a fictional radio station. Also you may not realize that Brocket 99 is such an explosive subject that the creator of the parody may put himself in a bad position by revealing himself. More on hiding in our next story.
Well, I'm here and it only takes one email to get the ball rolling. I'm more than willing to talk by phone too. I like you and what you're doing. Let's work together. If you want publicity for SNAG records or something else, I'm always here.
KLAW WILL CHALLENGE SCAR ON CD BUT...
IT'S ABOUT TIME!!! It's been reported that a Native named Persey Klaw from the Southern Alberta area will make an anti Brocket 99 CD. I have been looking forward to this for a long time. Although I am more interested to see how it will be handled.
According to an email received from the above mentioned Cowboy Snithx "Persey has just signed a deal with SNAG records to produce an album that is a focused attack on the infamous ERNIE SCAR." I believe that this is a very good thing. After 19 years it will be a relief to hear from an actual Native. One can only hope that it is a better presentation than the most of the terrible Brocket 99 rip offs or the sad, unfunny reservation radio CD released by "comedian" Don Burnstick.
Now the question is whether or not Dr. Persey Klaw is a real person or a character created by Cowboy Smith. I have never seen this Klaw. I have no clue whether he exists. I received two emails back in March of 2004 The last which was purported to come from Klaw read; "its about fuckin' time somebody addressed the brocket 99 mystery. i am ready to speak with you or who ever is willing to listen. i will be producing a 100% native created rebuttal to brocket 99 with the help of my new friend ronny pemican. you have a very informative website and i praise you on that. this new production has been a long time comin. some fuckhead by the name of cowboy smit keeps bothering me about brocket 99 related issues. those fuckers at brocket99.ca are full of shit. if you want to speak with me hurry up and do so, because i'm almost dead and there is only so much time. adiosa... ~KLAW"
It seems from what I gather of his emails and Smithx's that Klaw may be the personification of Ernie Scar and Cowboy Smith. But if I don't know whether Klaw exists at the time of his CD release, do I thank him for his rebuttal or bitch slap him for not meeting with me in person?
RED VS. WHITE IN THE STEREOTYPE WAR
You've heard that one man's trash is another's treasure? I believe that Brocket 99 is that exactly. But moreover it is a steppingstone for a dialogue about the problems that Native's and white people (or any race for that matter) have with one another. Look at the following two comments;
'I was in a bar and a bunch of indians broke in and had guns and scared all the white people to death for 3 hours while they drank. natives are drunkards and bums and do nothing to help themselves or others' -
"Oki. Just wanted to stop by and thank you for posting your racist comments. Whenever I am asked by white people why I believe they are racist I point out your web site as partial proof. Your web site also helps to instill in our youth the truth, that whites are evil and we must continue to fight them."
These are sad examples of what I deal with. I delete most of the very hateful emails from the guestbook but leave a few up so that you can see what is going on in the hearts and minds of people .
Happily I also get emails just like this one; "My friend and i listen to brokett 99 and he is half native and he thinks it is one of the funniest things ever."
Racism and prejudice is not a white thing. It's not a Native thing. It's a people thing. I would love to say that it will one day be dead and buried, but up to this point in the history of man(no so)kind I don't have much hope for our future. One answer to at least a better understanding I believe, is to continue the dialogue. Another is to realize that each one of us are unique creatures who's beliefs are molded by different experiences.
There have been personal offers to at least 4 full blooded Natives from Brocket, Alberta to write for this site since last summer. We made sure that they understood they could remain anonymous. At this time, none have taken the position. It is interesting to me that people will yell about our racism but when given the chance to become an equal part of this web site and have their own forum, they are rarely heard from again. The offer is still open. If you are a full blooded Native and would like to have your very own section on this web site with the freedom to say what you want, write us. I'm still waiting to hear from Cory Many Fingers. He is the latest Native to throw his opinion into the mix. I hope that Cory will make his opinions known.
THANKS TO BLACKFOOTCOUNTRY.COM
I want to personally thank Jeremy Russell from the new web site BlackfootCountry.com for being gracious in sending the following email to me." I am the Webmaster of the newly developed website Blackfoot Country. This site's main goal is to bring unity and discuss the issues surrounding the Blackfoot people, including the Apatohsipikani (Pikuni). Our site is very new and utilizes the very latest in web technology to our members. We welcome dialogue of any kind in our forums, yours included. Membership is free." Thanks and the best to you and the success of your site Jeremy!
THE BRIDGE INN APPARENTLY DIES
The Bridge Inn which was mentioned during a commercial break in our favorite parody has apparently closed its doors forever. The story that it may close was reported last year but sources say the deal has now been sealed. The same has happened to the Cromdale Hotel. Even 22 inch knives can't keep a good hotel open.
LENNY REDNUTS APPARENTLY LIVES
I received this in my email recently.
Press release (March 25/2005): There has been much speculation about a when the next Lenny Red-Nuts album would be worked on and completed. Well after some time, we have been able to get Lenny and his bandmates back in the studio for an entirely new album, a conceptual album, an album unlike any Brocket related album, ever. While listening to The Beach Boys digitally remastered album "Pet Sounds", I realized that this was the next step for Lenny to take. I spoke to Lenny about it and have never hearing of The Beach Boys, he said, "Fuck it!", so I played the album for him. Lenny was taken aback by this masterpiece and simply was so inspired with "Pet Sounds," we immediately started recording this album. To say that this album was an inspiration would be an understatement. In truth, the "Pet Sounds" album is an inspirational as the Brocket 99 broadcast for Lenny's up and coming album aptly named: "Sounds of Brocket." We have worked out a track list that we hope will get you salivating for as much as that case of Jack Daniels smuggled in from Lethbridge, Alberta. On behalf of Lenny Red-Nuts, his band and myself, we would like to give you this glimpse inside of Lenny's upcoming album. Lenny Red-Nuts "Sounds of Brocket" Track 1: look back Track 2: my friend ernie Track 3: meeting lethbridge style Track 4: tribal war Track 5: broken bottle/ broken heart Track 6: to the nay sayers Track 7: fire lynol/tom Track 8: sounds of brocket
This is the way to report news for a second anniversary!
We got lots of comedians named Don,
Brocket99.net would like to extend our sincere condolences to friends, family and all of those affected by the tragic deaths on the Reservation in Red Lake Minnesota on March 21st, 2005. We mourn with you during this very difficult time.